Tag Archives: Baz

Everyone kicks Baz’s ass at Ashley

Hi Guys

As everyone knows nothing can be kept secret from the shit shooting paparazzi for too long and it appears the trio may have been back in action today at Ashley near Tiverton, Devon

Details are a little sketchy but they could well have been joined by Gary “The legend” , Dr John also shot but we are not sure if he joined the trio, um, er…. quartet.

So the scores

Andy took the honours with a reasonable 76/100

Andy "The hat" with no hat taking the gold medal
Andy “The hat” with no hat taking the gold medal

Next up the Legend with 72/100

The Legend with his serious hat on
The Legend with his serious hat on

Bionic finger takes the bronze medal with a magnificent effort

Terry blasting his way into third place
Terry blasting his way into third place

And that just leaves today’s shit shooter. Everyone had a piece of Baz’s ass and when we say everyone, we mean everyone, A class shooters,  B class shooters, C class shooters, even the birds only crew got in on the action.

Baz must have been on his period
Baz must have been on his period

Just time for an honourable mention to Dr John, always there making up the numbers, always having a good time, always with his faithful companion in tow.

Dr John loading the finger of doom
Dr John loading the finger of doom

(Oops thought I had a picture of Dr John and pickles uploaded, better correct that later)

The scoreboard doesn’t lie

Baz must have been on his period
Baz must have been on his period

Happy shooting

Dereck

Beretta World 2016

Hi Guys

Very few details of this year’s Beretta world have emerged, who went, what the scores were, details of the layout, virtually nothing, except one small detail did escape the veil of secrecy.

Our star player had a shitzkrieg of a round, I have been told it was so embarrassingly shit no score card was handed in.

Beretta World's oscar winner
Beretta World’s oscar winner

Never mind mate there is always next year

Happy shooting

Dereck

Andy’s piles taste Terry’s size 10

Hi Guys

Our Star trio Baz, Andy “No more than five” and Terry “Bionic finger” were also at Meadowcroft this morning but we ( Big Gay, Me and Toilet Boy) are not allowed to shoot with them.

No guesses for who came out on top.

Baz with his gay European man bag
Baz with his gay European man bag

In second place putting in a stunning performance Bionic Finger

Terry feeling the pressure wipes a booger
Terry feeling the pressure wipes a booger

If the cream always floats to the top, the shit always sinks to the bottom and no amount of hemorrhoid cream is going to sooth the ass kicking Terry dished out today.

Andy "The hat" with no hat getting his ass kicked.
Andy “The hat” with no hat getting his ass kicked.

An honorable mention to Dr John for trying to bribe the officials

Dr John bribing the officials with 40 quid and Baz looking on in disbelief
Dr John bribing the officials with 40 quid and Baz looking on in disbelief

Happy shooting

Dereck

Big Gay Al couldn’t hit shit

Hi Guys

Saturday evening I get a text from Baz a fully paid up member of the my shit don’t stink trio asking if me and Big Gay Al were shooting, seems his buddies have snubbed him, yeah sure dude I replied we are going to The Cotswolds Gun Club, so that was it we were all set for some shooting. I also sent a text to Joss the new shitshooter from a couple of weeks ago.

Sunday morning All arrives and we get into character, then collect Baz and finally onto pick-up Joss. Knocked open his door and it was like the grave, dog started to bark and there was a little rummaging of the curtains then Joss appears like a cast off from a zombie flick. Uuuurrrggh, uurrrgh ugg, fflllluuuuug he said are you going shooting, yeah we said, oh fuck he said sorry guys, well we sent you a text, mass snubbage from the newbie.

As is traditional we stopped for a magnificent breakfast at the Toby Carvery on the way.

Me and Baz started the round with a great eight apiece while Al only managed a four, me and Baz continued with sevens, eight, nines and tens while Al followed behind with fours, fives and sixes, on the last stand me and Baz were even and Al only need nineteen out of ten to win.

Today's hero
Today’s hero

Baz squeaked a couple lucky clays to take today’s honours

Bottled the last stand
Bottled the last stand

The pressure got to me and I slipped into second place

Two stands behind and still smiling
Two stands behind and still smiling

Big Gay Al his shit stinks of shit

Happy shooting

Dereck

Annual christmas shoot in Devon

Hi Guys

Today was the annual christmas 200 bird shooting expedition to Ilfracombe, Devon. The day starts with us all meeting up for breakfast at Northgate Inn South Molton, shit shooters gathering from all over the West Country, places as far apart as Bristol, Burnham-On-Sea. Crewkerne and Cornwall,  there was 15 of us this time round

After breakfast we convoy to The North Devon Shooting Ground, Ilfracombe for a friendly 100 birds before driving across town in the afternoon to The Southwest Shooting School for another friendly 100 birds

I had bearly set foot through the door and had the waitress at The Northgate Inn complaining at me that I hadn’t warned them we were coming, oops! As a punishment my breakfast took hours to arrive

Dereck's filling breakfast
Paul checking out Dereck’s filling breakfast with Baz, Alf and Gary

Checking in at The Nortth Devon Shooting Ground

Shit shooters on tour
Shit shooters on tour

And heading out for some shooting fun

Sam and Jim leading theway
Sam, Jim and Gary discussing tactics

We were all winners today, just a group of friends having a good time shooting, here are as many attending shit shooters as I have pictures off

Mark looking kind off serious
Mark looking kind off serious
Jim getting down on his bird
Jim getting down on his bird
Dereck reeling them in
Dereck reeling them in
Baz a smile to rival Big Gay
Baz a smile to rival Big Gay
Andy shooting with more than five
Andy shooting with more than five
Terry putting on a good show
Terry putting on a good show
Sausage out on day release
Sausage out on day release
Big Gay Al, yeah he is smiling the other side of that stock
Big Gay Al, yeah he is smiling the other side of that stock
Carl only just showig his boy how to do it
Carl only just showig his boy how to do it
Phil making up the numbers
Phil making up the numbers
Carl Jnr maintaining his spot in ;last place
Carl Jnr maintaining his spot in ;last place

Action shot of the day

Big Gay Al claybusting in style
Big Gay Al claybusting in style

And not that it matters but here are the scores

Scores Devon Christmas 2015

Happy shooting and wishing everyone has better scores in 2016

Dereck

I hit those rabbits, honest guv!

Hi Guys

It appears Andy and Terry are once again a duo today, I guess Baz is still recovering from several  weeks of jerking off with his carney buddies.

Anyway the duo arrived at Meadowcroft, Marksbury, Somerset for a 100 birds registered a little later than usual after stopping for breakfast at the Lillypool cafe Shipham. On the way in they met Gary West Trucks who was just leaving after shooting a round of 58, he said it was all a bit gloopy and some cars were sliding down the slope into parked cars down in the lower car park which meant the duo had a bit of a stroll down from the upper car park.

Andy started the round with a straight and was all set for a monster score, a few stands later Terry was at the oche a pair of low crossers, a couple of pairs in and the trapper didn’t see a hit and asked our man if he had hit them, honest Terry said “No” and with his place in heaven assured carried on with a clear conscience.

Nothing much happened until the last stand a fast rabbit followed by a looper, apparently Andy missed two rabbits by a country mile but the trapper announced he had straighted the stand, “Well” said Andy “If she gave to me I will take them”. I don’t know how he can sleep easy at night

Which from the scores (See note below) I have makes this weeks winner …….

Dr John sporting a priceless pair of Pink Flamingoes
Dr John sporting a priceless pair of Pink Flamingoes

Yeah that’s right Dr John, those expensive shooting glasses must really be paying dividends

Terry blasting his way to second place
Terry blasting his way to second place

Terry “Bionic finger” came in one clay behind the doctor

Note:

Andy "I did hit those rabbits, honest guv"
Andy “I did hit those rabbits, honest guv”

After an extraordinary meeting of the commitee it has been decided to a null Andy’s score for being a cheating A-rab which makes him this weeks pus oozing boil on a gorilla’s arse.

Happy shooting

Dereck

News update

Hi Guys

There has not much activity on shit shooters for a few weeks now, I did get some scores come in from Terry of the my shit don’t stink trio but owing to my computer breaking down (I think it got a bad case of Gaymidgetpornitus) haven’t been able to post anything, hopefully later this week I can get back on the case, in the meantime though here is a quick news update.

Star player
Star player

It’s carney season so our star player Baz has been jerking off in the carney shed with his carney buddies.

Big Gay Al - Does this guy ever stop smiling?
Big Gay Al – Does this guy ever stop smiling?

Big Gay Al took such a pummeling on his last shoot at Springway Park he hasn’t been able to pick up a gun since, making all sorts of excuses about fences to put up, working and farm stuff to do.

Reaching for a high one
Reaching for a high one

With the deer season started Dereck has been off in the woods with Chris his stalking buddy

Mr Bionic finger
Mr Bionic finger

Terry took some time out to have a bionic finger fitted, he can now miss an easy pair in half the time

Andy in the zone
Andy in the zone

Haven’t heard from Andy, I guess with no mates to play with he has been playing with himself

Dr John sporting a priceless pair of Pink Flamingoes
Dr John sporting a priceless pair of Pink Flamingoes

Not sure what Dr John’s been up to, looking so cool I expect he has been having a hard time fending off the chicks.

The look of determination
The look of determination
Popular Jim
Popular Jim
Tony our ethnic minority representative
Tony our ethnic minority representative
Dave wasting lead
Dave wasting lead

New comers to shit shooters John, Jim, Tony and farmer Dave went to Mork a few miles north of Chepstow just over the bridge last week where once again Dave proved farmers can’t shoot.

Happy shooting

Dereck

Baz has the shits

Hi Guys

The my shit don’t stink trio were back down to a duo this weekend as Baz cried off on an early start for a 100 birds registered at Meadowcroft Shoot,  Marksbury with a bad case of the shits.

That just left Andy and Terry representing.

Andy enjoying my 28 incher
Andy enjoying my 28 incher

No prizes for guessing Andy came in first on 78/100

Terry pointing the finger of doom
Terry pointing the finger of doom

Coming in with a strong 65/100 Terry will be a force to be reckoned with in about 75 years

STOP PRESS

That last pint of Doombar was a bad one
That kebab must have been off

Captured on CCTV Baz had the shits bad

Happy shooting

Dereck

Interclub shoot final round – Westonzoyland

Hi Guys

Today was the last round of the interclub series of shoots between Cannington, Shipham, North Newton and Westonzoyland shooting grounds at Springway Park, Westonzoyland, my home ground.

Weather was good, started a little misty but the sun soon broke through making for a fine morning’s shooting.

Mike and a friend arrive like lambs to the slaughter
Mike and a friend arrive like lambs to the slaughter
A crowd gathers at stand 5
A crowd gathers at stand 5
A view from the west end
A view from the west end
The Boss - Jackie
The Boss – Jackie
Baz reflecting on a poor first round
Baz reflecting on a poor first round and Big Gay Al pretending to look interested
Big Gay Al - He shot shit but is still smiling
Big Gay Al – He shot shit but is still smiling
Mike fabricating teh scores for Shipham - It's teh only way they can win
Mike fabricating the scores for Shipham – It’s the only way they can win
Baz checking his tyre pressures
Baz checking his tyre pressures

I haven’t got the final scores yet but as soon as I do they will be posted here

Happy shooting

Dereck

The my shit don’t stink quartet at Gunsite

Hi Guys

The my shit dont stink trio picked up a fourth member today on a trip to Gunsite, Gloucestershire for  a 100 birds registered. I had a couple of photos sent to me earlier taken with Baz’s left bollock, he apologized for the quality saying his right bollock takes better pictures.

Must have been an easy layout as the scores were quite high.

Baz -Purple suits me
Baz purple suits me

Yeah, yeah no prizes for guessing who came first with 86/100

Matt
Matt – The Hi-Lux of destiny

Coming in second was Matt on 84/100 a most respectable score

Andy at the Lai Ding massauge parlour
Andy at the Lai Ding Light massage parlour

In third place was Andy with 75/100, if he hadn’t stopped of at the Lai DIng Light massage parlour for a quick happy ending maybe he would have shot better

Terry stood in something nasty
Terry stood in something nasty

That only leaves poor old Terry bringing up the rear on 69/100

Happy Shooting

Dereck