What a great day to be alive, 7:30 on a crisp English summers morning, a little dew on the ground, blue skies, a wisp of a breeze and the golden sun just starting to warm things up a little, grabbing my trusty 28 inches it was off to pick Big Gay Al up and head off to Devon for a mornings shooting
A quick forty-five minutes later we were at The Pitstop Cafe, Marsh Barton for breakfast and what a fine breakfast it was too.
Just look at this breakfast
After breakfast had settled a little it was time to take the thirty minute hike back to Ashley, Devon’s premier shooting ground for a friendly 140 birds.
What about the shooting?
Al put me in first on a simo pair of tasty looking crossers, much to my surprise I hit them, hit them again, and again, and again, finishing up with a magnificent 9/10, apprehensively Al took to the stand and walked up with an embarrassing 4/10, it was all over.
Al never recovered from that 5 clay deficit, over the next 13 stands, he pulled a couple back, I pulled further out in front, he pulled a couple back, until the last few stands when he eventually found some form but it was too little too late.
Wood spring Bay Shooting Ground at Wick St Lawrence on the Somerset coast was open today so Big Gay Al and myself went along for a friendly 100 birds
The usual mixture of easy, testing and WTF clays were put on by Trevor and his crew, we even had a tip from Bionic Finger to leave stand one tip last, so heeding his warning we headed for stand two
As has become the norm we both got off to a pretty good start with a couple of eights, then he got an eight, I got a seven, he was one up, I was one up and so on. Going into the last couple of stands we were all even but today unknown to me it was Al that was on a promise from Jane and he totally fucked up on an easy incommmer followed by a zippy little quartering riser, handing victory to me.
Being the first weekend of the school holidays and having got stuck on the motorway for 2 hours on Saturday it was decided to go somewhere fairly local that didn’t require a trip on the M5. After some thought we picked Brookbank, Draycott in Somerset. Big Gay Al had never shot there and it had been 10 years since I shot there.
After a coffee and a condescending safety talk from the owner it was off with our claymate in hand to shoot the sporting layout.
The layout started pretty good with a great variety of clays but soon descended into shit as after about the seventh stand or so the next five or six stands are on the end of their various trap layouts which made them impossible to shot when people were shooting trap disciplines. so it meant we had to go back and shoot some of the first few stands.
As usual the round started well enough with Big Gay taking the lead, me taking the lead and as usual going into the last couple stands we were pretty even, then once again I couldn’t help but think of the good time Trudy had promised if I let Al win and all went to shit and I totally fucked up an easy incomer and a floppy 10 yard teal.
We hadn’t been to Ashcombe near Exeter in a while so 8:30 this morning me and Big Gay Al struck out on the 45 minute drive to The Grill On The Hill at Kennford for breakfast before making our way to the shooting ground only another 5 minutes along the A380.
We were going to start the day with a round of skeet bunnies but one of the traps wasn’t working so good so gave up.
The round started well for me with a two clay lead on the first stand, two stands later we were even, then Al took the lead by a clay, stretched it out to four clays before I hit back with a couple great stands leaving to all to play for on the last two stands.
I then remembered Trudy (Big Gay Al’s wife) said she would show me a good time if I let Al win because he gets all grumpy if he loses, with this thought ringing in my mind I handed victory to Al.
You may have noticed over the last few weeks I have been stuck balls deep in the biggest pile of shit shooting known to man but this week I had a massive incentive to kick ass.
At the weekly Saturday club meeting at the workshop Big Gay Al said if I managed to kick his ass he would buy the doughnuts, he obviously didn’t realize the rashness of his comment as anyone in the trade should know nothing gets between a mechanic and a doughnut.
Sunday morning filled with confidence I picked up Al and off we went to Ashley near Tiverton, Devon for a friendly 140 birds.
I had been given some Hull Superfast to try out which were only a 27gram load.
Al was up first and made a complete balls up of the stand, I was in hoping that 1 gram lead deficit wouldn’t affect my score and made not quite the balls up Al made but a balls up never the less.
The first stand must have been a one off as over the next few stands we both got 8s, 9s and 10s with the lead going back and forth, then out of the blue Al had a shit one leaving the door wide open, he did manage to pull a couple back but it was all over, the doughnuts were mine.
So Big Gay Al swings by the shop yesterday asking “Where we shooting tomorrow?” Seems he is fighting fit again. After a short discussion and having not shot there in a while it was decided to go to Mendip Shooting Ground, stopping for one of the west country’s finest breakfasts at the Lillypool cafe
Little known to us there was a 100 bird competition on today in memory of Arthur Hill with a cup for high gun.
It all started pretty well with the first few stands me and Al neck and neck but as appears to be becoming the norm now mid round I came down with a massive attack of shitshooteritus allowing Big Gay Al to open up a mildly impressive lead, one that I never quite managed to reel in on the home stretch
A couple of weks ago Big Gay Al suffered a nasty masturbating accident.
During a final bout of feverous climatic stroking he managed to pull some rib muscles, not only was it a massive disappointment being denied as he was about to blow his bag but it also put him out of shooting action.
All the shit shooters in the world wish Al a speedy recovery
Another Sunday morning and once again the clay ground is calling, today it was the Cotswold Gun Club that was honoured with our presence.
We stopped for breakfast at the Toby Carvery as is usual for a trip to the Cotswolds and this time didn’t end up on the M4 heading to London, which was actually quite lucky as the M32 was closed.
I started off pretty good with a couple of eights, Al started of pretty mediocre with some sixes but then I turned to shit while Al upped his game on the home five stands it seemed Al couldn’t miss and I couldn’t break one if I stepped on it, I did manage a straight on the last stand but too little too late.
Today’s winner Big Gay Al
Today’s steaming pile
Couldn't hit a barn door